Roses are red.
Violets are Blue.
We won’t just celebrate our love because the greetings card, flower and chocolate companies told us to.
Are we cynics? Probably. Are we wrong? Probably not. Don’t get us wrong, we love love. And we love each other. And yes, it sounds hypocritical of us to create a wedding blog to celebrate the hype around a wedding and to turn our noses up at the allocated date in the calendar dedicated to showcasing love. But there’s a difference.
A wedding day happens once. You spend that one day celebrating a freshly forged permanent union between two kindred souls and you invite those close to you to share in your celebration. I intend on having one wedding; one husband. I tell him every morning, every night and multiple times through every day that I love him. He doesn’t need me to buy him flowers and dinner to show that love. I show him that every time I buy the extra bottle of wine on the way home from work, or when I walk the dog early so he can have a lie in. He shows me when he gives me extra gravy or adds Yorkshire puddings to a roast that isn’t with beef. I realise this makes him sound like a lazy lush and me like a greedy gannet. Both of those things are only partly true.
That being said, I don’t want to insult those who do want to show it on Valentine’s Day. You do you, huns.
I enjoy Halloween. Others don’t. That’s fine.
Some people celebrate Easter, some celebrate Hanukah. Others don’t. That’s fine.
Some people get excited for the Oscars, or the Met Gala, or the final of Strictly Come Dancing. Others do not. That’s fine too… though if you don’t watch Strictly, what do you do with your Saturday nights in Autumn?!
And if you don’t have anyone to share Valentine’s day with, so what?
This “holiday” (I use the term loosely) is just an over inflated Saint’s Day. Even the origin of which Saint it refers to is mirky. Apparently there are three different Saints named Valentine. Some think a man named Valentine, later honoured as a Saint, sent a love note from his prison cell to his jailor’s daughter signed off with ‘From Your Valentine’. Some associate February 14th as the start of birds mating season. Some believe Valentine’s Day is a ‘Christianised’ version of the Pagan Festival of Lupercalia, a Roman festival celebrating the fertility of women and crops, when eligible girls would be paired with the city’s bachelors for the coming year.
But St Valentine is also the patron saint of epilepsy and the patron saint of beekeepers, and I doubt restaurants and hotels would be upping their prices for one day if that’s what we were celebrating today.
The point is there are no rules. Like what you like. Do things because you want to do them. If you want to go overboard and buy chocolates, flowers, dinner, cocktails, a hotel room, a new dress, new nails and a Brazilian wax then go for it babes. Just don’t do it cos you’re pressured into doing it, do it cos you want to shower your loved one with love.
I suppose that is something we have to remember as we prep for the wedding. The spectacle of the day needs to be a celebration of our love, because we love, not because we have to. There are traditions that are expected, there are conventions which have become standard. But it will be our day and it has to be what we want in order to celebrate our love. We shouldn’t do things because we feel they are expected of us, we should do them because we want to, or at least want to reinvent them.
So how can I round this up without sounding grim? How can I finish the post acknowledging the validity of displays of affection without indulging in societal expectations. OK, here goes.
Roses are Red.
Violets are Blue.
Happy Beekeepers Day Liam.
I Love You.